Recently, there has been a spate of incidents reported in the social media about domestic violence leading to the death of one of the partners, usually the woman. These stories are very sad indeed because it is obvious from the comments of close friends that something was wrong all along.
Many survivors of rape, kidnap, abuse, and all other kinds of violations usually say that when they came in contact with the person who violated them, they ‘felt something was wrong’ but decided to over-ride that feeling. This is also true for people who have survived accidents, and people who have been duped in business. They all had a ‘feeling’ but decided not to dig deeper.
Think about it…how many times have you felt that you shouldn’t do a deal with someone but you went ahead because the deal looked good and you ended up being duped? How many times have you felt ‘there’s something not quite right about that guy’ but you decided to date him and not too long after he manifests a behaviour that shocks you?
This ‘feeling’ that we all have is our God-given INTUITION. Simply defined, intuition is that ‘knowing’ that you get without thinking about the issue consciously. In essence, it is a part of us that is connected to the largest ‘database’ in existence, and by this I mean the Spirit of God who teaches us all things, if only we would listen. As I was writing just now, this came to me: IN-TUITION means ‘inner teaching’. WOW!
One of the values I have always cherished is parental consent. Call me old school, but in talking to many people who have gone through divorce, their mother said on meeting their intended only ONCE “you have not yet found a wife” or their father said “this guy is not good for you”. Somehow, they just know and then they observe. Yes, there are cases of parents who are motivated by greed or social appearances but I have found also in these cases that someone who is an authority figure in their life had the courage to speak the truth.
So how do we develop our intuition?
1. Pay attention. In today’s busy world, attention is becoming more and more scarce. There’s so much hype and things are moving so fast that most of us just join the crowd and subsequently lose the ability to discern our own thoughts from what’s popular and current. Paying attention to your ‘gut feeling’ before you take a decision takes practice and discipline but it pays huge dividends.
2. Stop rationalising. Rationalising is when you get a strong feeling about something or someone but because of what you stand to gain, you explain it away or squash that feeling and push it out of your mind every time it rears its ‘ugly head’. If you continue to do this, it will eventually impact your ability to discern situations for what they are, and you will unfortunately also suffer the full consequences of staying on this path.
3. Dig deeper. Don’t be afraid to ask questions about why you are feeling what you are feeling. Don’t be under pressure to take a decision that you are not comfortable with – in life and business. Most of the time when we are feeling heavily pressured to take a decision, there is something important at stake so it pays to fully understand the ‘check’ you are feeling in your spirit before you move forward.
4. Trust. We don’t all know or acknowledge God, but it is in His nature to keep reaching out to us. I believe that our intuition is one of our God-given survival skills and we need to trust it more. It’s way more than what we can contact with our natural senses, or process with our brains. It’s not always logical, which is why we need to trust it more.
When anyone asks my opinion about whether to date someone or take a job or do a deal…whatever, one of the first things I ask is ‘how do you feel about it?’. More often than not, they solve their own problems by the time we talk it through and I end up looking like a really good counselor :D
Finally, in the words of my darling husband, when you have a strong feeling about something: Don’t Doubt Yourself!
Question: when was the last time you listened to your intuition and you were proved right? Has there been a case where you didn’t listen to your gut feeling and you regretted it? Please leave a comment below.